Bob's Blog

I'm not a big fan of American Idol. Actually, I'm not even a little fan or a possible, "I've seen the light" future fan of American Idol. There's something about the future of pop music being put in the hands of a few people that doesn't sit well with me. But I know millions love the program and when ABC News did a report on American Idol charity show, I was amazed at what I heard. The viewer age group that watches Idol is the young, roughly the teen to mid twenties range. In two nights, American Idol raised over $60 million dollars from an age group that is hard to target in raising money. Young people are typically self-absorbed, so how do you get a normally non-giving age demographic group to open their pocket to the tune of $60 million dollars?

First, no matter what resonates with Millennials, it is a sure bet they'll be committed to it. Millennials have a strong value to commitment but only to what or who connects to them. They love American Idol, and if the performers think giving is a good idea, then so do their audiences. That flows right into the second reason, which hinges on relationships. Remember, relationships are at the top of their value list. Just ahead of their Ipods and latte. When you live and die with the participants week in and week out, you feel a connection with them. It's like you know them, and they're almost like family to you. In other words, you trust them, and trust is huge to this generation. The "messenger" is trusted, and you're happy to give to those whom you trust.

I like to think that the Church does that. We have a trusted Messenger for this generation with a Message of Hope and Love that resonates with them. Who doesn't want that? That Message is communicated through trusting relationships with ordinary people called Christians. Now, I'm not a believer in "cookie cutter" answers, because I know it's a lot harder to open one's heart than to write a check. But I remember how I came to Christ. It all started when a girl I trusted asked me to go to a Bible Study with her. Because she built a relationship with me and I trusted her, I heard the Message of Jesus' love for me. I hate to think of where I'd be today if it wasn't for those Christian relationships I had in high school. And if it takes American Idol to remind me of that, well, maybe I need to watch it a little more often.

Being out in Indiana gave me the opportunity to catch up with friends. I had the chance to stay at the home of Nate and Joanna Zuck. Nate and Joanna are in their mid twenties and both are on staff at a church in Winona Lake. They were very kind in sitting for an interview on young adult leadership. Here is just a little of what they shared.

Bob: What do you look for in leadership?

Nate:

Someone who is real and has earned it. Nothing drives me more crazy than when leadership is handed to people.

B: What do you mean "earned it"?

Nate:

Investing in people. Whether they have a title or not, they'll invest themselves into others. I'll follow that person even if they don't have a title.

Joanna:

A person who is relational and authentic. They care for me. I don't have it all together so I want someone to take the time to get to know me.

Nate:

I think a person who knows every ones role...they should understand team work. I've learned from sports about going for the "big win".

B: "Going for the big win?" What does that look like?

Nate:

Understanding your team and getting them involved. That way you're multiplying leaders instead of one person or one group that's doing all the leading.

Joanna:

I also like to know where people are going. If I know where they are heading it makes it easier to follow. Education can play a part but it doesn't mean I'll follow that person just because they have a degree.

B: Do you think leadership opportunities in the local church are open to most young adults?


Joanna/Nate:

I'm not sure. I know we have deep passions and we desire to "go for it"... ...Maybe we're too young. Not enough experience to lead.

Joanna/Nate:

We do desire roles in leadership that are decision making... ...Yeah, our generation really desires to have those types of responsibilities that are impacting in and outside the church.

B: What do you think would happen if your generation doesn't feel they have a "voice" in their church?


Nate: My generation would leave after a while...

Joanna:

I think the key is wanting more relationship with those that are older than us. I think my generation wants more direction from those above us...to be mentored. I think some (older leaders) have reached out to our generation but I think it catches us off guard. We don't expect them to pursue us. Relationships help us to have a "voice".

Nate/Joanna:

Relationship is key for us but I'm not sure if our age group is committed... ...We're motivated by relationships but not very committed to them.

Nate:

It's all about the "experience" but what are we contributing?

B: So, even if you were pursued...

Nate/Joanna:

It's about our "personal journey"......The church or organization might be committed to us but I'm not sure if we would be (committed to the church).

Nate:

It can be all about "us" and what we get out of relationships. Maybe we need to learn a little more from those older than us on what leadership is...like Joanna mentioned about being mentored.

B: Thanks.

I just returned last Thursday from Winona Lake, Indiana, so I'd like to share a little from my trip. Some of you know that I received degrees from both Grace College and Seminary in Winona Lake and that I worked at the college for a number of years as a Resident Director. My friends in California always ask me why I enjoy going back to the Midwest for vacation. They think I'm crazy, but I tell them that I have a lot of good memories out there and I really do like the seasons. Well, maybe just the time from May to October because the winters can be brutal. I also go back to work for CE National on different projects that I'm doing for them. There's some beautiful landscape out in the Midwest and some great people as well. Some of my closes friends still live back there. I love California, and I'll always be a West Coaster at heart, but there's something relaxing about the middle of the States that I like to return to and walk a slower pace.

A friend and his wife picked me up from the airport. He's in his early twenties and was a former RA (resident assistant) of mine who worked with me at the college. He's a great person and even though we have a lot of years between us, I don't feel "older" than him. We have a mutual respect for each other, and in many ways, what we share is a great example of a true mentoring friendship. I have many friends who are in their twenties and I truly value who they are as people. Young adults are the same wherever I go. They each have their own uniqueness about them. Although they may have different values from each other because of where they were raised, they're still young people navigating together through life.

One evening I was invited to a small group of twenty year old. Usually, if I'm in a young adult small group, I'm leading the discussion and questions, but that night I was just a silent observer. It was interesting to hear their conversations as they led each other through the evening. It's a different perspective when you are quietly listening rather than leading a group. Nothing earth shattering, just normal thoughts I hear from young adults around the country. There were questions about the future or theological issues that interested them. All normal stuff from the view of those who have lived twenty-five years and are entering into a new world called adulthood.

I had many conversations with other friends out there. We talked about Post-modernism, politics, remodeling, Cubs and Pirate baseball (which is an oxymoron because we all know that neither the Cubs nor the Pirates really play baseball) and whatever else came to mind. I took a walk down to the Village, an artisan street full of shops by the lake, with another good friend and former RA. We watched cyclists race by the Village shops as we shared about the things God is doing in our lives. There were a lot of laughs and plenty of Midwest cooking. It was a very relaxing and encouraging week for me, and as I was leaving to head back to the busyness of LA, I thought to myself,"How blessed I am to have these friendships in Christ!" Young or old, it's all good in Jesus.

I came across an article written by Gary McIntosh of Biola University about what young adults want in leadership. I thought this was very insightful and thought provoking for those who work with young leaders whether in a church, school, or Christian organization. Here is what Dr. McIntosh wrote:

Young leaders want...

• a relationship
• honest and direct communication
• to feel they are an important part of the leadership team
• to spend time with their supervisors outside of work
• to feel they are involved in ministry that is making an impact in real ways
• to be allowed to make mistakes
• a collaborative atmosphere
• to be given responsibility and to be held accountable
• a say in their job description
• to be taken seriously
• honest affirmation
• to be supported openly
• to be mentored

Some of these observations are not uncommon in previous generations but there are some differences. What young leaders desire is real impact in a significant way. They want to impact the world around them within a mentoring relationship. That's different from other generations that were content with overseeing programs with no real relationship with their senior leader. Churches today must find ways to actively involve young adults in leadership. Most young leaders will tell you that they feel separated from or adrift within their church. Many will tell you they feel that their church leadership does not pursue them or that they lack the opportunity to lead in their church.

Does this reflect the thoughts of young adults in your church? Here are a few good questions for your church to answer in order to see how you are helping young leaders reach their potential. First, how is your church actively pursuing your young leaders? Be specific with your answer. You should have a clear example of how your church is proactive in going after and training young leaders. Second, where can they lead in your church? When I say lead I mean real areas where they are making decisions that impact the direction of your church. Young leaders are like any other leaders in that they not only want responsibilities but the authority to make changes.

One last thing to remember about young adults and leadership: leadership must be earned. So, giving a title or position doesn't necessarily equate leadership to young adults. Trusting someone as a leader comes by spending time, seeing their abilities, and sensing that they care for those they are leading. In other words, relationships are key for leading with young adults.

Lately I've been thinking about leading and what it means to lead. I've read a lot of books on leadership, some by CEOs, coaches, war heroes, and I usually come away with some good insights but not really satisfied. There always seems to be another book on leadership, just one more book to buy. Why? I think it's because I still don't know what leadership means. What I've read communicates that leadership is about a "title." It's about power. It's something to be grasped or a skill that had transferable steps to be mastered. However, leading seems more "put on you." Leading means that there is influence. Over time, you've earned the right to influence, not because you will it but because others "put" influence on you. Leaders lead with a voice that others want to be influenced by. Isn't that one of the characteristics of leading? What you have to say is impacting and carries authenticity. So much so, that people start to ask,"Where are you going?"

This is true of Jesus. Those that followed Him were so intrigued with His life style that they wanted to know more. They like what they heard but not in a way that makes you laugh or cause you to agree with what is being said, only to forget later. What they saw and heard helped them to evaluate their life. He made them want to sit down and take in all His teaching. Jesus had that affect on people. People sat and listened for hours. I always wondered when I read these stories in the Bible of those thousands listening to Him if these people had jobs. I guess I would have skipped work if I encountered a person like Him. I do that now. I read those passages in Matthew or Luke and I'm thinking whoa, can I just stay and soak all this in? What an amazing example of leading. I guess that's why reading about Jesus never gets old. It seems so simple, dynamic, real in how He lead. It makes me think that I should take a sabbatical from other ideas of leadership and just sit a little longer with Him. After all, I've got the time.